2024.7.1
What charity do you think I should jump into? Do mine. It’s called the wonder of reading. We help raise funding to keep libraries in public schools. I went a crap school in a crap neighborhood, and reading really got me out.
2024.7.2
They’re South Sea Black pearls. Polynesian legend says that they bring good luck to couples in love. Caleb. You’re not gonna find a better gift that says “This was a love meant to be”.
2024.7.3
And speaking of friends. I’m sorry I was so harsh with your friend Naomi. That’s not usually how I do things here. Oh, no. Naomi. We just went to school together. We were never really that close. Make sense.
2024.7.4
Bad love letters beg for love back. Good love letters ask for nothing. This, I’m pleased to announce, is my first good love letter to you, because there is nothing more for you to do. You’ve already done everything. I have enough of you in my head to last forever.
2024.7.5
Okay, the calls in one minute. I’ll just do it from here. I was planning to be holding my Louis Vuitton shopping bag, but the cat took a dump in it.
2024.7.6
We’re both realists. We’re both cute. And we’d both rather die than let someone else control us. I see the point of this place now. This crap hole is a monument to self-reliance. I found the drapes in a dumpster. Can you believe it?
2024.7.7
Everything you said is true. I’m not ready for this. I have 17$ in my chequing account and no clue how to write a resume. Yeah, a couple of days ago, that didn’t bother me, but now it’s all I can think about. Well, you’re gonna have to do more than think. I will.
2024.7.8
It’s making me embarrassed for you. Come on. Admit it. You like it. I like having conversations with adults. Playing star wars is worn out and immature. You like me because I’m immature, there’s not enough immaturity in your life.
2024.7.9
Snob? Me, okay. I’m not a snob. Okay, let’s just says, if I was a billionaire, and we were out on my giant yacht in the middle of Mediterranean, sipping champagne, and I went in to kiss you. Would you have kissed me back, then?
2024.7.10
Dixon. What are doing here? Uh. I just came to let you know that I’m okay. And that I support you and that I want you go out there and tell the truth. But, look, I was just upset that I couldn’t fix the past. And I realized that could fix right now.
2024.7.11
Hi, I’m max. We’re lab partner. Mm. Lucky for me. Are you gonna put on your lab goggles? Yeah, right. They’re gnarly. I’m not wearing them. Why do I always get stuck with the airheads?
2024.7.12
I see you’ve been watching my live webcast. It’s still going on, you know. Screw them. They’ve had enough of you. Figuratively speaking. I borrowed my neighbor’s mower. I came right over. That almost rhymed. I spent a minitute on it.
2024.7.15
Debby, welcome to our home. Marly is a spirited dog who loves interaction. We’ve never left him before. But we’re sure he’ll behave just as he does when we’re at home.
2024.7.16
Amber? The mayor comes tonight. I’ve never seen him without a big stogie in his mouth. Uh. I hate those cigars. I can never get that stink out of my hair. What? It’s you. You have to get his lighter. I’m not doing that.
2024.7.17
Something wrong? Something’s got to be wrong, because I don’t want to be your personal servant. Well. I don’t know. You’ve just been giving me the stink eye since I rolled out of bed. Yeah, at noon.
2024.7.18
I think what you’re doing is great. And I would love to be involved. Really? I can make an appearance, and bring a little press attention to it. Now I won’t deny it’s great publicity for me. It would also help your friend. And maybe a lot of other people in similar situations.
2024.7.19
You okay? I’m fine. Dad. You don’t have to worry. You know, last time you said that, you took off. I didn’t see you for three days. I’m really sorry, Dad. Bella, do not ever do that to me again.
2024.7.20
We agree to never go back to that jerk’s wine place again? Our 2-person boycott will bring him to his knees. Why are you always putting things away? Getting ready for Laurie to come over.
2024.7.21
What up with your arm? What’s that? I said. What up with your arm. Tweaked it a couple days ago lifting weights. Looked like more than a tweak. Really, I’m fine. Okay.
2024.7.22
Alice, is it possible that everything is true? The fairy tales and horror stories. Is it possible that there isn’t anything sane or normal at all? Hey, I think we need to go back and see if Jacob’s okay. I hope Paul sinks some teeth in him. Serves him right.
2024.7.23
They had a circus party there tonight with some first time fire breathers. Now our rooftop venue does not have a floor. This is a disaster. No place to get married and no one to get married to. I think disaster is an understatement.
2024.7.24
What is wrong with you? Doctors are supposed to be sensitive. I mean, it’s Valentine’s Day, and she has nothing. Couldn’t you be like every other guy on the planet lead her on and not call her the next day? That is the decent thing to do.
2024.7.25
So what we are doing? Well, I was thinking maybe we could watch a movie? My mom has a collection of black and white British garden comedies of manner from 1930s. Those are always a hoot. That’s what you have planned for tonight?
2024.7.26
I can tell you right now how much I have in my wallet right down to the dollar without even looking. Justine’s wallet too. It’s true. He’s anal that way. He doesn’t even like it when I let different denominations touch. What can I say?
2024.7.27
Look, I know you’re new to this parenting thing, so I’m gonna tell you how it works. You can’t force a kid to do stuff. Cause then it just leads to a lot of door slamming and name-calling, and then the kid gets angry, too.
2024.7.28
I’m so sorry I broke you and Andy. Whatevs. Do you have any red wine? I’m out of red wine. Yeah, like 2000 bottles. What can we be real? I need you and Andy to work.
2024.7.29
Wow, everybody looks so normal. This is more like sorority row than skid row. Hi, I’m Kaite. Just found out there’s three to a room, and I was wondering if you guys have chosen a roomie yet. Wait, there’s three in a room? Yeah, I know. You want to be careful who you get.
2024.7.30
Guys, thanks for picking me up. I have a super low rating on uber. I’m sorry. I get carsick. Everyone gets carsick after a bottle of tequila.
2024.7.31
Why’d you cut your hair? I wanted a change. I’m not crazy about it either. The stylist kind of talked me into it. Maybe I’ll get used to it. There wasn’t a stylist. You cut it yourself. You cut off your hair and dyed it a different color.